Monthly Archives: June 2010

Many warned us that, because of the impending November elections, Elena Kagan’s Senate Confirmation hearings this week were going to be more political theatre than usual.  That would imply that it was ever theatre to begin with.  Unless a person clerks for the Supreme Court, is unusually wonkish, or retains useless information for no apparent reason, about the only moment the average American can recall of any of these proceedings over the past twenty-five years is something about a pubic hair on a can of Coke.

When I think of theatre – good theatre – I think of a compelling script, characters having an arc within the story and, if I’m lucky, an unexpected denouement.  Heck, if I’m willing to shell out the money (averaging $80 a ticket), I’ll even get a song, a dance and a little seltzer down my pants.

I’ve tried hard to find out just what these Supreme Court nominee confirmation hearings cost, but it’s unclear.  The Congressional Budget Office doesn’t exactly keep tabs.  They’re too busy trying to figure out whether the Multinational Species Confirmation Funds Semipostal Stamp Act of 2010 is going to cost money and whether pay-as-you-go procedures apply.  Regardless, let’s all agree that having tables set up with water pitchers and glasses, dozens of chairs, microphones working, lights on and cameras rolling isn’t a zero-sum game.

Each of the senators from the Judiciary Committee on Monday was allowed an opening statement – all NINETEEN of them – before asking questions of Solicitor General Kagan on Tuesday.  Couldn’t the Dems and the GOP just pick one person each to deliver their collective thoughts?  I dare you to come up with a memorable line from any of them.  “Worryingly, Kagan made a lot of political decisions when she was a political adviser to President Clinton,” is what Chuck Grassley (R-Iowa) said.  First of all, “worryingly” is awkward.  I would have started, “It concerns me…” but, then again, I’m not running for re-election in the fall.  (Grassley is an Iowa institution.  He hardly has anything to feel “worryingly” about.)

Senator Jeff Sessions (R – Alabama) spent entirely too much time trying to get Kagan to admit she was pushing a homosexual agenda while dean at Harvard Law School when she upheld limits on campus military recruitment because of the Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell policy.  Honestly, what did Sessions expect her to say?  “Senator Sessions, it’s true many think I’m a lesbian and I do have a soft spot in my heart for women who play softball and men who are friends of Dorothy…”

Now, if a taxpayer from the DC area were to take their money, currently being used for these Senate charades, and put it towards, let’s say, seeing the Broadway tour of “Legally Blonde” in Virginia come August, they’d get this about Harvard: “I did the Peace Corps overseas/Inoculating refugees…But now I’m on the legal track/Because this country’s out of whack/And only women have the guts to go and take it back…Harvard’s the place for me.”  Afterwards, the taxpayer would get a dance number and leave with a souvenir playbill.  There’d be memories of an enjoyable evening out.

If you were forced to get a ticket to the Kagan hearings, at the very least you’d probably be able to fit in a nap (wearing shades inside, of course) and not really miss a thing.  Oh sure, pundits are commenting on what a good sense of humor Kagan has.  She’s hinted at possessing the wit of a fun dinner guest, but she’s hardly slaying ‘em in the aisles.  For that matter, neither is former comedian, Minnesota senator Al Franken, although he was smart enough and good enough to get a little shuteye and sketch some pictures and doggone it, people like him.

It’s important to keep in mind that the Supreme Court justices are not supposed to be political.  Why then are their confirmations anything but?  Of course, no nominee should ever get the rubber stamp after being properly vetted, but even the Republicans have all but admitted that Kagan will be confirmed, probably by a vote of twelve in favor (Democrats) to seven against (Republican).  So my question is, why are we spending the money to put on this show?  Sure, it’s not even close to the $1 billion spent by Canada for the G-8 and G-20 summits last week which bought them a fake lake, but the hearings feel and look more like a boondoggle every day.  Though Kagan once said she thought the Bork hearings of the 1980s were “the best thing that ever happened to constitutional democracy”, neither she nor the senators asking the questions seem willing to emulate them.  The same can be said about the confirmation of Roberts, Alito and Sotomayor before Kagan.

In conclusion (the legalese is creeping in), I’d like to propose that some of our tax money spent these past few days by the Senate Judiciary Committee be given back to those living near the Beltway, or vacationing close by in a month.  Payment should come in the form of orchestra seats to “Legally Blonde”, playing August 12-15 at the Wolf Trap Theatre in Vienna, Virginia, a mere thirty minutes from the Kagan hearing room (without traffic) on Capitol Hill.  Trust me; Elle Woods will give them their money’s worth.  These hearings will…yawn…not.

I took him home with me. Was that wrong?

You’d have to be living in a cave not to recognize that the minions are taking over the world.  They’re on billboards, they’re at iHop and now they’re all over my house.  It’s fine, though, because they’re adorable and so is the movie in which they appear.

“Despicable Me” had its premiere in downtown Los Angeles yesterday afternoon.  Several thousand showed up to watch Steve Carell’s super villain Gru try to steal the moon with the help of three adorable little orphan girls.  And the minions.  Can’t forget the minions.  I want one, and not just the inflatable punching bag minions that we all left with Sunday.  The diminutive one and two-eyed yellow dome-like creatures aren’t the stars of the movie but they might as well be.  I dare you not to crack a smile every time they’re on screen.

During the summer, parents will take their kids to just about any movie rated PG or G because, let’s face it, there are a lot of hours to fill during June, July and August.  After sitting through one too many slapped together, indecorous films created simply to fill the coffers of movie studios, I’m no longer one of those parents.  I’d rather force my kids to watch “Up” for the tenth time at home or, God forbid, read a book than take them to see “Furry Vengeance” EVER.  But “Despicable Me”?  It was my pleasure to sit through its 95-minute running time.  The filmmakers know the importance of an original story, a taut script, imaginative actors to voice the characters, and a little daddy/daughter poignancy to tie it all up in the end.  And those minions!  Along with Russell Brand’s funny old geezer, Dr. Nefario, the minions assist Gru in all aspects of his villainous goals in order to trump his nemesis, Vector, a nerd villain who also wants to shrink and steal the moon.  Add orphan sisters Margo, Edith and Agnes, and Gru’s mother, voiced by Julie Andrews, and it’s fairly impossible not to enjoy the journey.  I recommend.  (Opens July 9th.)

Let’s talk television.  I don’t watch much of it during the summer months because I still think it’s all reruns like when I was a kid.  Also, the girls always seem to be lurking and just about all of my viewing is inappropriate for anyone under 21.  I hate summer bedtimes!  Occasionally, they sleep over a friend’s house or do shots of Benadryl after dinner which puts them right to sleep.  I can then watch some of my favorite shows reappear just when I need them the most.  I’m also still catching up on some recorded programs from the past few months, namely “Justified” on FX which, if you haven’t seen, you should try catching some episodes on Hulu.  My addiction this past spring was to “The Good Wife” on CBS, now in reruns Tuesdays at 10pm,“Nurse Jackie” on HBO (rent Season 1 on DVD), and “Glee”, also in reruns on Fox, Thursdays at 8pm.

“The Good Wife” is a smart, criminal law drama starring Julianna Margulies as the cheated-upon spouse of Chris Noth, playing a fictional Eliot Spitzer.  Great cast, intelligent stories, in addition to a complex, ongoing plot, AND it’s shot in New York City.  That means that great stage actors appear in guest starring roles, a la “Law and Order”, giving the show an elevated pool of talent as well as a gritty locale (though it’s set in Chicago).

“Nurse Jackie” stars Edie Falco. If Falco decided to read the phone book, I’d go and watch.  Her Jackie Peyton is so flawed and so unapologetic about it that I found it hard to wait every week after an episode finished to spend more time with her.  Come to think of it, every character is flawed, and laughingly so.  “Nurse Jackie” has great actors who’ve each done something interesting with their roles.  Also shot in New York and you know what that means.

“Glee” is just silly.  But it’s superbly produced and the cheapest way to feel as if you’ve seen a Broadway show every week.  Jane Lynch, as the complicated cheerleading coach Sue Sylvester, is gold.  I was happiest this season when the producers saw what I saw, namely that Lea Michele and Idina Menzel are the same person and, stretching the age difference, cast them as mother and daughter.  “Glee” should make you happy.  Tune in and catch up.

“Mad Men” returns Sunday, July 25^th and is the most beautiful show to watch on television.  You’ll pretty much hate all the characters but watching them suppress their emotions (or not), move about gorgeous mid-century sets, drink, smoke and have extramarital sex regularly – well, it’s not to be missed.  There’s a reason this show continues to win a truckload of awards, including the Emmy for Best Drama the past two seasons.

And okay, I’ll mention soccer, though I’m still devastated by the US loss on Saturday to Ghana in the World Cup.  As this country is a true melting pot, I have friends now rooting for Germany, Spain, Portugal and Uruguay, so I’ll guess I’ll join one of them and keep watching.

Wimbledon continues all week.  The big upset so far: Andy Roddick losing to the number 32 seed, Taipei’s Yen-Hsun Lu.  John Isner, of the longest match in tennis history fame, lost in the 2^nd round to the Netherlands’ Thiemo De Bakker, and quickly.

Monday Monday, so good to me.  Monday Monday, it was all I hoped it would be…

Meg Whitman.

There are myriad reasons to vote and to pay careful attention to the candidate for whom you’re voting.  At the very least, it gives you the right to complain afterwards, especially if the person you chose didn’t win.

Looking at November, here are just two examples I’d like to bring to your attention that illustrate the kind of people who run for office and often win, because they have either too much money in their coffers or voters aren’t doing their homework, or both.

Martha Dean is the GOP candidate in Connecticut for state attorney general.  Recently, she said this regarding her decision to advocate for firearm training in schools, scouts, camps and elsewhere: “…we teach sex education in school, yet we omit the most basic skill needed to exercise fundamental constitutional rights.”  In the same speech, she wonders why the government thinks they only have the right to own modern weapons and the people get the antiquated ones.  Huh?  Dean promises to stop any law from passing that attempts to make distinctions between different types of weapons that an individual may possess, because the Constitution doesn’t make distinctions.  SEMI-AUTOMATIC WEAPONS DID NOT EXIST IN 1787!  If they did, the framers probably would have made a distinction!  If the framers were alive today, I’m sure they’d apologize for the vague and confusing language they used when writing the 2^nd Amendment.  If they were alive, they’d probably shake their heads at Martha Dean and say, “No, no, no.  That’s not what we meant AT ALL.”  Can you imagine the public schools today being required to teach children how to use a firearm?  Just after they’re taught about how a baby is made?  If people in Connecticut don’t pay attention when they’re voting, this woman could be their attorney general.  Don’t take my word for it.  Check out her speech on YouTube.

Meg Whitman is running for governor of California.  Before I go on let me say, though it will come as no surprise to anyone who reads my site regularly, that I’m left of center.  However, regarding the state in which I live, I would vote for Donald Duck of the Quack Party if I thought he could fix what ails us, namely the fact that we’re broke.  But the GOP’s Whitman?  I just think she’s icky.  Her voting record over the course of her adult life is practically non-existent.  Her excuses – busy raising the family, working, moving around a lot – doesn’t cut it.  It takes almost no time to register to vote.  Actually going to the polls on election day not only feels good, it’s our duty.  Anyone who is so uninterested in being a part of something so important, who suddenly decides politics is where it’s at, is suspect at best.  People keep asking her about this and guess what?  She’s tired of answering the question because she’s not an idiot.  She knows there is no good answer.  But she did answer questions about a confrontation involving an underling at Ebay in 2007 by dismissing it as simply a “verbal dispute.”  Problem is, those wacky folks over at the New York Times discovered that wasn’t quite true.  On Thursday, Whitman admitted that, yes, there was physical contact.  There was a verbal disagreement and “I actually…you know, escorted her out of the room…” after which the subordinate, Young Mi Kim, complained.  There was a settlement from which Kim received a purported $200,000.  Whitman condescends, acting as if we’re all too stupid to recognize that her attitude towards us is patronizing.  That just gets my Irish up.

Thoughtful voting.  Consider the alternative.

11 am, Saturday. US vs. Ghana. Be there.

Let’s get BP out of the way first even if it seems the oil will never go away.  There was a glitch this week when Robbie the Robot accidentally bonked the containment cap way down deep.  It was removed, more oil flowed, and then replaced ten hours later.  BP claims they’re catching about 25 thousand barrels a day out of the 35-60 thousand barrels that are gushing.  Alabama fishing boat Captain William Allen “Rookie” Kruse committed suicide on Wednesday and, though he left no note, it’s assumed he was despondent over a wrecked fishing career in the Gulf.  Tony Hayward is no longer the talking head of BP after saying and doing things he shouldn’t have said and done, so the honor now goes to Robert Dudley.  Regardless, I think Michael Sheen should play Hayward in the movie.

According to the Rolling Stone article, General Stanley McChrystal eats just one meal a day and functions on four hours sleep.  I don’t know about you but when I’m hungry and tired, I don’t know which way is up.  I definitely don’t know how to get Taliban insurgents, who don’t want people to bake bread or women to leave their houses, to make nice.  McChrystal resigned/was fired this week and replaced with General David Petraeus of Iraqi surge fame.  What kind of confidence does it take in a man to believe he can effect positive change in Afghanistan and make this war wholly worthwhile?  I wish him well, honestly.  It looks as if June will end up being the deadliest month so far in the almost nine year war for US and coalition troops.

France was in a bit of a tizzy this week as workers around the country went on strike to protest the government’s move to raise the retirement age to 62 from 60 to address their deficit.  I’m afraid my sympathy for them is non-existent.  My mother just retired at 80, not because she LOVED working (she liked it) but because she HAD to.  Sixty is the new fifty.  You can’t retire that young.

Quick, name the most recent former Prime Minister of Australia.  If you said John Howard, pat yourself on the back, but you’d be wrong.  It was Kevin Rudd, who was replaced this week in very masculine Australia by a woman, Julia Gillard.  You go, girl.

Congressional negotiators reconciled the House and Senate financial reform bills today after pulling an all-nighter in order for a vote to take place next week.  This is a sweeping overhaul, affecting banks ability to do business in derivatives and creating a new consumer protection agency.  Didn’t we already have one?  Needless to say, the bill was approved on a party line vote.  I’m an optimist, but I’m guessing the proposal doesn’t go far enough in reining in the elaborate derivatives market.  I fear investors will again figure out a way to wine and dine the regulators, convincing them that all is well, while making millions for millionaires and billions for billionaires.

South Caroline lost its mind in this past week’s primaries.  Confederate Strom Thurmond-land chose GOP state representative Nikki Haley to face Democrat Vincent Sheheen for governor in November.  First, Haley’s a woman.  Second, she’s an Indian American – dot not feather.  But wait, there’s more.  The GOP nominated a black man, Tim Scott, to face another black man in November, Democrat Ben Frasier, to fill a soon to be vacated, GOP owned, U.S. congressional seat.  South Carolina is surely up to something.  I love it.

Isner vs. Mahut.  Did you see the longest tennis match ever?  It started in May and lasted until just yesterday.  756 hours, 24 minutes.  Fifth set went 247 – 245 to Isner.  During the match, there was a regime change at Buckingham Palace and Charles is finally King.  (It’s after midnight and I’m punchy.  Just got back from a “Grease” sing-a-long.  Summer lovin’ – had me a blast.)  Actually, the match began on Tuesday, resumed Wednesday, and then finished up Thursday.  It was great stuff.  The fifth set went 70-68 to Isner.  Eleven hours, five minutes.

The U.S. beat Algeria Thursday at the World Cup and won their group for the first time in forever.  The only goal of the game was scored in the 90^th minute and had me on the edge of my seat.  Saturday’s U.S. match against Ghana in the round of sixteen is on at 11am, PST.  Mary Pat, you should choose your birth country over your adopted mother continent.  Is there any question?  Geez.

G’night or good morning, depending on the hours you keep.